The What’s What, Volume 1o6

Why Is Catholicism A Punchline And Islam Untouchable?  -WaltWhitesHat

Because old guys who are supposed to be moral leaders turning out to be peepee touchers is ironic, while crashing airplanes and bombing buildings without any direct confrontation or chance to defend yourself is scary.  Not saying it’s right, just how it is as I see it.

I was in third grade when 9/11 happened. I remember coming home and my parents and sister were watching the news all day and I was like wtf is this man, i wanna watch digimon bro. A real tragedy. -Chispart66

I was in Kindergarten and some old guy had come into class to read “My Dog Skip”. He finished it and everything.

Are there any types of prank devices that can disrupt TV signals?  Like to turn off tvs, mess about with random settings, anything like this? -PriorityMale

A universal remote, genius.

So, I saw the Dragon Ball z movie on HBO a couple of days ago.. To call it shit is insulting to human waste.  -amazingbagman

I thought it was a perfect representation of the source material.

More overrated rapper?  Tupac, Eminem, or Andre 3000? -DuSheauwnDre

Tupac, his death made him a martyr. His lyrics were elementary.

Have you seen the 3D optical illusions of children playing they are using as speed bumps in Vancouver?  -Corks

I have not.  However, I don’t think fucking with the eyes and heads of people in charge of 2 ton vehicles is a great idea.

I have been having really fucked up dreams since seeing Inception. I’ve seen the movie three times, and I’ve been dwelling on its concept for a while now and its just such an original and unique film. Since I’ve been obsessed with it I’ve noticed my dreams have been lasting way longer than normal, and I’m remembering so much more when I wake up in the morning. Not to mention I’ve even had a couple lucid dreams where I was in complete control, and the dreams I’ve been having seem so much more realistic. -jbscotchman

I can’t help but pity people who have such an overwhelming emotional reaction to someone else’s fiction that they have to modify their reality.  A seriously unfortunate scenario playing out more and more often. What a herd of vapid, feeble-willed simpletons.

I wouldn’t have given security Brandon Jacob’s helmet either.  It’s not like he’s gonna need it.. But seriously don’t act like they use the same helmet all season.. it’s doubtful that they even use the same one all game.. let the man keep the helmet if the dumb ass is gonna throw it. -Cl3ms0nTigers

I would have told the security people that it’s evidence of an assault in my possession and if I am not catered to, then the NY Giants, Brandon Jacobs, Lucas Oil Stadium, the Indianapolis Colts and the stadium security would all be hearing from my lawyer. I’m not even kidding. When a foul ball or puck goes into the crowd, you get to keep it. If they take it from you, then the player has to trade something to you for it. If security wants it that bad, they should have given him tickets or a jersey or something.  Some giant pissed-off uber-wealthy monster doesn’t get to whip 2 pounds of hard plastic at me without paying for it.

The What’s What, Volume 84

Whats up with France owning the Muslims?  No burkas?  Shit is about to get real. -King_Of_Things

Oppressing oppression seems like hypocritical justice to me. I’m on the fence.

Ever eat Cream of Wheat? Best hot cereal ive ever had in my life. Add a little milk and a spoonfull of blueberry jam after its cooked -Wurrdz1

Not since they stopped making the Apples & Cinnamon green box version.   I can’t find it anywhere and it was the only kind I liked.

I main Archer on Fat Princess, you? -SooperToobes

I worker rock, timber, and machines until they’re set, and then it’s archer for me.   I like healing as a priest also, but that’s pretty much all I do.

My wife and I are wanting to “get into” wine. You know, so we can be pompous asses like Frasier Crane and sip wine all day long. Problem is there is a ton of it! So many different flavors, grape varieties, brands and on and on ad nauseam.
Any suggestions for first time drinkers? -IwontheInternet

I am currently into German wines, Riesling and Gewurztraminer.  I suggest going into a wine store, not necessarily a liquor store and simply talking to the sommalier if the have one, the good stores will. Or the owner or someone should ask you a couple simple questions like sweet/dry, red/white, food pairing, and price limit, and come up with a couple good suggestions.  I would also suggest researching tastings in your area.  That’s always a good start.  Good luck, enjoy.

I love watching vintage porn. I tend to watch it for the intricate plot and character development.  Just recently I watched one where a couple go out to a disco and it shows them afterward talking about how it went. He says something along the lines of, “I don’t know baby, I know other guys like that sorta of stuff but it just doesn’t really do it for me. Nothing compares to alone time with you.”  Then she’s like, “Well let’s do something about that. I think I can give you just what you want for your birthday” I’m thinking to myself, whoa whoa whoa since when is it this guy’s birthday? This is insane, I did NOT see this coming.  -Indubitably

LoL  What a twist. But, I agree. The plots are far more detailed and intricate with vintage porn.  My only complaint is the overuse of facial expressions during the actual act.   I don’t need proof that he’s enjoying his blowjob.

Why do people believe in aliens even though theres no physical proof of them? but not ghosts? -RedmanCoasting

We do have proof that all sorts of life can live on other planets because we have all sorts of life living on ours.  And with the proof of all this life and death on our planet, there is not proof of ghosts.   I think that’s a fair corollary to make.

So does Tiger Woods win the Lifetime Achievement award for Biggest Career Suicide Ever? -Travis-Tea

Maybe.  We’d have to see his career die first.  Who knows?  This might make him stronger.  In any event, I’d like to point out that Paul Reubens lost everything for masturbating to porn.   And don’t give me that “in public” jive.  You mean “in public” being an adult movie theatre?  Where theres a close-up of a 12 foot long penis being inserted into a gaping 3 foot wide vagina 20 feet from your face?  Who the FUCK is complaining about a penis in an adult movie theatre?

What’s the point of EBAY sniping? Just bid how much you’d be willing to pay and be done with it. I’m trying to get a certain game for a certain price. I’ve homed in on what I believe to be the lucky price.. that is, the price that it doesn’t go for very often, but that I’ll be able to get it at eventually.  The last seven in a row have gone exactly the same way. I have high bid until the last few minutes, and then some asshole puts in a last minute bid.  Just put in the god damned bid when you see the item, outbid me right away, and I can go on my way and bid on another item. This bidding/waiting/getting sniped/bidding on another auction is getting to me. -M0NoD_MD

So.  If I am following you correctly, you are claiming that you know how it works, can see it coming a mile away, choose not to use the strategy to your own means, and get pissed when the inevitable happens?  WELCOME TO HOW EBAY WORKS.