The What’s What, Volume 13

You are a person with no religion, where do you get your morals? -mafia149

There alot to be said for the instincts of morality.  Alot of people see benefits in supporting others, naturally.

Is it wrong to say that Africa is extremely uncivilized? -Burntcheese

They’re civilized enough to milk retarded Americans from their bank accounts over the internet.  So, they got that going for them.

Is G4 an epic failure of a channel? I flip through it occasionally and it’s. just. awful. I don’t know why it’s still on air.  X-Play sucks donkey balls and is so one-sided it’s not even funny. -RuebenPubes

When a video game channel stops talking down to its audience with immature writing, zany “in your face” hosting, and shaky cameras for extreme effects, the public will not allow itself to take it seriously.  Any industry that thinks its doing its customers a favour by referring to them as and marketing to them as “pimply faced virginal teenagers” is not going to succeed.

Ever since Guitar Hero appeared on the market, people don’t care about Dance Dance Revolution. It just overtook it. But Guitar Hero gives that feeling of being a rockstar.  Still show DDR some love. -HiRoll3r

You mean those idiots dancing all the time in front of people at movie theatres and arcades thinking that people were admiring them when, in fact, they were ridiculing them, gained no tangible positive long-term effects?  All that training in synchronized hopping paid no real life benefits?  I’m shocked.

Would you rather date a stripper or a porn star? On the one hand the porn star would be extremely experienced. Extremely, but the stripper also knows quite a bit of moves. The porn star’s sausage wallet would be way more loose than the stripper, though. Lets say the chances of them having an std is equal. They are equally hot and you can’t have both. -Edamiller

Which ever one would allow me to sit in her house all day, eating her food and playing PS3.

If Toby is really gone from The Office I’ll probably stop watching even though I like Amy Ryan’s character a lot. -Farleylives

I almost peed my pants when Kevin was getting food from the vending machine, and the new HR girl thinks hes retarded.  I love the new angle.  Toby was a wet blanket. Good Riddance.

fargo is such a great movie YA DARN TOOTIN! -hjde4450

You were such a supah lady! *sobs uncontrollably*

i’m thinking of opening a topless barber shop…. i need a name for it and I’m stuck on “a bit off the top” any suggestions? -ChesterBronzekettle

Trim ‘n Trim?

You wake up and the Earth is empty of humans.  What do you do? -SmallFarva

Probably rob a bank first, just in case its temporary.  Then Id probably play Corvette demo derby.  Drive a few luxury sedans full of fireworks off cliffs.  Maybe burn down some places I think suck. It be pretty destructive for a while.  After that I’d probably try to wrap my head around how solar power works, so I can get to handling when the power grid shuts down.

Remember “Who let the dogs out”? -blanketmedia

*Does the macarena*

I’m 17 and waitresses still ask me if I want a “big person” menu at restaurants. What the hell. I hate looking so freaking young. I will be ID’d till I’m in my 40s at this rate. -pokemaniac1311

Tell her “If you want a “big person tip.”  Only really hit “Big person tip” with inflection and finger quotes.  She’ll get the point.  Also, Pokemon e-mail addresses aren’t doing your adult credibility any favours.

Are there any real life facilities that have a self destruct sequence? I don’t know. -P_O_T_G

I read somewhere that the the UberSuper conductor they are building has 24 independent points they can cut off a test with large explosions.  It would destroy the superconductor.

Why do people hate hippies? -Kryogenetix

People just hate preachers. The people that think that their way of living should be imposed on everyone. And hippiedom has a high percentage of preachers; Vegetarians, pacifists, idealists.  Most hippies believe that what they are doing should be the way for everyone. Its the same reason I hate most churchie republicans.

The Whats What, Volume 2

Why is there no Queen songs in Guitar Hero? -Crackah_Jack

I completely agree.  To not include Queen in any Guitar Hero or RockBand is a travesty to music.  Frankly, I’m shocked they aren’t releasing these song collection disks 5 a week.  Its so crazy popular.  If I were ELO, or Pearl Jam or something, Id be developing my own disks to work with the controller.  Just think of it; Pearl Jam needs a new guitarist, you eventually challenge to win the spot, and then go on tour across the country, making set lists and  trying to rack up high scores so you can renegade panties and buy new axes.    Anyways… 2012 marks the end of the Mayan calender which is our solar system completing it’s rotation around the milky way. It’s not the end of the world, it’s the end of the era. We’re supposed to enter the age of Aquarius in 2012. And yes the Bible predicts this because the Bible is nothing but an ancient book about astrology. Armageddon/Revelations is about the end of the Mayan calender and it re-starting it’s cycle. Why aren’t you worried about this? -_Chike_

Theres been like ten of these over the past ten years; Y2K, 5/5/05, that day that all the planets aligned to the closest point they ever would.  Nothing ever happens. The Mayans just stopped writing the calendar.  Its just the guy in charge of calendars decided they’d take a break.  Or its when the Spanish wiped em all out, and they were in the middle of making 2012.  “Hey Scott, what comes after Wednesday again?  Oh shit, you got 7 fucking arrows in your ribs.”

Why don’t black people tip? -w4rlock

Because most think that the service is part of what you are paying for.
I worked in a restaurant for 15 years, and I knew black servers that wouldn’t give black people any service.  And because of this practice, the black people that would normally tip, get crappy service, and have every right to leave no tip, reinforcing the stereotype.  

What MMORPG are you playing now? -Lothar121

I play SWG, on the Chilastra server. Its not as nerdy as it sounds.  Always wanted to try a MMORPG, but never got into the elves and dragons thing. I enjoyed the Star Wars movies, so it seemed like a natural choice.
I do not regret my decision, its quite fun. Complicated for a game, but fun.

I took a drunk girls virginity last night.  I’m not proud of it at. I had no idea she was still a virgin and she asked me not to tell anyone afterwards. The worst part is I wasn’t drunk – I was driving tonight. She was coming on to me but she was pretty hammered…like I said, I feel pretty crappy about it. -borntolose1

What you did was fine.  I bet she was delicious. Good for you.  Theres really nothing like a virgin. Ive had a handful, and the residual feeling of knowing she’ll think about you forever as her first is better than the awkward sex you just had with a virgin.  You can’t buy that kind of recognition.  The fact that she doesn’t want you to tell anyone about her virginity means shes lying about it, anyway.  Get yourself tested.

is to catch a predator the best show ever or what? -lsueben

I dont like this show, only because it makes me feel bad for child molesters. They’re totally fucked and they’re just digging their own graves to Americas delight. These guys should be waving middle fingers in front of their face yelling “*** Chris Hanson, *** NBC, **** your sponsors” until the cops come.
And then not a word to the cops until you get your lawyer around.
Cause the lawyer would get you out of there with less then a misdemeanor.
Child molesters get treated like scum and rightfully so, but why cant I know if theres a rapist living on my block?  Or a murderer?  Or a car thief?   Or a guy that hits people with a nine iron when the Rangers lose?  I know a couple that were caught screwing on the twisty slide at an elementary school playground.  They have to register as sex offenders.  They are still together today to explain the situation when confronted by neighbors, but can you imagine if they were not?  What kind of life my friend (the guy) would have to lead?