The What’s What, Volume 79

What’s the most common cause of negativity in your life?  A person?  An event?  Work?  -goodlucky7

Hands down, when my basement floods.  It’s just so disappointing to know that your next twelve hours will be spent in some shorts, making sure the electronics are off the ground, canceling any plans I might have had and sweating my ass off lifting 20 gallon tubs for the indefinite future.   I assure you, it’s the momentum equivalent of getting fisted by the Incredible Hulk when he just finished shopping for habanero peppers.

I give up. Internet Explorer I tried, I really did but I just can’t put up with you any longer. I’m moving on, downloading Firefox as we speak but before I add my my bookmarks should I investigate Opera or Chrome? -tradingfaces

You give up, now? You’re the WWII equivalent of the Japanese guys all bunkered into some dormant volcano who thought they were avoiding the Allies for 30 years and got smacked in the face with Disco when they were uncovered.  Any of those three, just not IE.  100%  Welcome back. The Red Sox won the pennant 5 years ago, and Arnold Swarzenegger is a Governor. Don’t hurt yourself.

Who is your favorite Celebrity (of all time) to share your first name? -Develabmentor

Ever since that episode of Extras, Patrick Stewart.

Why Couldn’t Seinfield get an REAL reunion?  Is it because the show hasn’t really held up over time?  I mean the one on curb was ok but it was more like a behind the scenes stuff and not a real episode, I would have liked to seen a real one on NBC like 30 minuets or an hour.

Saying that Seinfeld has not stood the test of time is incorrect.   Seinfeld has been the 2nd most syndicated show in history, right behind the Simpsons. Affiliates would not be airing the show if it did not resonate with viewers today. It pretty much swallowed up Cheers in terms of syndication. So, that’s ridiculous.

Also, Seinfeld did get a REAL reunion on CYE. I’m not sure if you had noticed, but with the read-throughs and rehearsals, you got an entire episode of Seinfeld in. For me, it was like watching a new episode of Seinfeld, and if it’s the way they wanted to do it, it worked fine for me, and it’s better than nothing.

Can you dance?  I find it awkward.  No matter how skilled a dancer is I still can’t help to think from time to time that dancing is odd. -ArchieBunkerDown

Dancing is retarded. Its about the most primitive thing a human being can do thats considered socially acceptable these days.  But,  it’s fine if you want to, just keep it down for everyone else who would rather use their minds to have stimulating conversation with someone else and not spaz around some maple tile to Kool & The Gang for the thousandth time.

So there’s a Tila Tequila blowjob video going around. If you’ve got an ET fetish, heres your chance. -Czechlist

Giving or recieving?

I’m Netflixing a new series.  Deadwood or Mad Men?  You’ve been boosting both series.  Which one first? -phkb33

You’re talking about two of my favorites, right nyah.   Deadwood has boobies and an insane amount of swearing. So, that’s a big plus. The dialogue can be a little confusing, but its not too distracting.  Mad Men has nostalgia, and epic writing, but it can get a little soap opery sometimes.   You can’t go wrong with either one. Mad Men is a little more light-hearted, and Deadwood is a little more gritty.   I’d go with whichever you have the mood for. Mostly light-hearted fun and heavy drama, or handfuls of “Holy Shit!”

I really hate the shirts they made for the Yankees when they won the World Series. Did MLB really have to mention on the shirt that they won it 27 times? If the Phillies won, I highly doubt they’d say “3 Time World Series Champions” on the shirts. -2JeterisGod2

So, this is what you get to complain about after your team has won that many championships.   I always wondered.

This Christmas, I have declared JIHAD on high prices!!! Join me brothers!!! JIHAD!!! Join me my brothers as we rain savings upon the nonbelievers this Christmas holiday!! Clip coupons, scour the internet and hit the infidels where it hurts, in their wallets!!! -MoneyJack

Allahu Bargains!

Any non Christian who celebrates christmas is a poser. -Nickelwise

Jesus’ birth is decided by lots of theological scholars as being late spring, early summer. So, saying you celebrate your birthday 5 months early is hardly an accurate celebration of your BIRTH DAY.
Decorating trees and your house with lights is just to bring some light to the shortest days of the year, the winter solstice.

Or you can quote some scripture from the Bible and prove that it’s all Christian based.  If it was really a birthday ceremony for Jesus, we’d all be wearing bathrobes to the petting zoo instead of participating in dozens of documented Pagan traditions; like presents, mistletoe, christmas trees, and lights.

The What’s What, Volume 56

Convince me that God does not exist. -uninteresting_thoughts

No one can convince you. You can only accept it.

My friend smoked weed for the first time and threw up about 10 times very loudly in the bathroom.  I can see now why some people don’t like it. -TheMichiganKid

Which makes no sense since they give it to cancer patients to stimulate appetite and reduce nausea. I wager your friend was either ridiculously nervous and anxious which led to the Technicolor yawn, or he was drunk also.  Maybe he ate too many munchies?

Illegals? Love em or hate em? -Demi-Gurl

Love them. It’s not their fault Americans aren’t charging them taxes. They are exploiting a systems weaknesses, if we don’t choose to fix the system, I feel like we don’t get the right to complain.  Kind of like the bailouts. I don’t blame the banks for exploiting poor regulation. I blame the government for allowing it to happen in the first place.  The government thought banks would police themselves. I can’t even begin to explain how hilarious I find that situation.

what do or would your parents think of your blog?  let us already acknowledge that you don’t care what they think… -stella

I do care what they think.  The more likely turnout is that they wouldn’t care what I think.  The blog is public, and they aren’t reading it, from what I understand.  I wager my Dad would be upset that the first dozen sexual experiences in my life (either inappropriate or welcomed) were directly related to the church, its clergy, its parishioners, or church functions.  Either that, or he’d be upset at just how vocally agnostic I am.  My Mom, however, is lucky if she knows where the power button is.  This is the same woman who said to me once “Crack/Pot, Whats the difference?”  after finding a bong.  So, yeah, she seems to be an unlikely reader.

So it seems the newest fad is sliders…Burger King, Friday’s, Red Robin. They really are getting on that bus.  -LineThreeleven

I don’t like how everyone calls them sliders. I think White Castle should have copywright to that name.

You are stuck on a deserted island. With you are two people. One is an extremely ugly woman. She is morbidly obese and has terrible acne. The other is a transvestite. She looks like are really hot female, only, she has male genitalia. Chances are you wouldn’t have been able to guess that she used to be a man.  You are here forever, so no-one would ever know.  Who do you bang? -MaizenBloo

The actual woman.  Chances after after starving herself for a month or two, she’ll look pretty hot after she loses that weight. Nothing but hard work, sun, and burning calories on a deserted island. That’s if she doesnt eat me first.

I want to date this girl, but she smokes cigs. shes pretty cute, pretty smart, a democrat, an atheist, and listens to indie This year I hung out with her every morning before school Should I go for it? I’m not a fan of cigs. They taste like shit and smell bad too. -localnewsteam

You should tell her the only thing holding you back from ravaging her is that she smokes. How will she be able to live with herself knowing that she could have had you if only she quit smoking?  Getting her to change who she is is a big part of any healthy relationship. Just be sure that YOU get what YOU want.

how famous is Ricky Gervais in America? he’s huge in England and i was just wondering how high his rep is in the US -gamingdiety

Extras made me a fan.  I think any American interested in the comedy scene knows who he is.  As far as writers/creators of TV shows go, he’s pretty famous.

So how the hell was David Carradine supposed to jack off if his hands were tied? -SubwayJared

That’s what the underage hooker was for. You think he flew to Asia to masturbate? Really?

when someone is super-defensive about their drug use habits, that constitutes a drug problem.  You deny you have a problem. See where I am going with this? -Superdickery

Way to cling to antiquated consideration, Dr Drew.  If I accuse you of being a terrorist and you deny it, because you are not a terrorist, this somehow makes you a terrorist?  Denial is a social reaction, not a symptom.

Did you end up picking up Trash Panic? -ProfessionalCrastination

I bought it. It’s crazy ridiculously difficult.  The lack of a tutorial really doesn’t help the situation.  I’m pretty disappointed.

lol, tim donaghy getting beat up in jail -CMackVA

Wow, someone who turned on the mob gets assaulted in jail. This is the first time that’s ever happened.