The What’s What, Volume 55

Where do you buy your clothes? PhilbinAddict

Marshalls, TJ Maxx, GAP, Eddie Bauer, Lands End, LL Bean. Thats it. Always.

Gay high school kid named Prom Queen, thoughts? -FoleynJackin12

I don’t think it’s all that cool that he took away the pinnacle moment of some vapid teenage girls life for the lulz. I don’t really care though. At least he’s not reinforcing negative stereotypes or anything.

Do you like cold pizza? -Meyerheimer

Yes. But I find some pizza is actually better the day after out of an oven. Dominoes for one, is better heated up the day after than when they bring it to you, somehow.

I got confirmed today! -SandyKoufaxsprostate

Congrats, now you get to confirm that Father Larrys penis tastes delicious.

What do you think of girls that wear Converses with formal dresses? -OnCloud8

Hey look at me! I’m being individualistic by conforming to what everyone else is doing! Flip flops and high heels are the only appropriate choices.

Do you care if other people do drugs? -Tunapurrito

To an extent. Depends on the drug. Harder drugs like PCP, Meth, crack, and heroin have real social problems associated with them. My tax dollars pay to help get them off of the mistakes they have made. Which I don’t mind as long as the treatment works.

But mostly I have problems with people who have never tried drugs making broad accusations about the effects of them on the user and society. If anything, I have a problem with people NOT doing drugs and then forming an opinion on them based on some propaganda a cop who can’t handle a beat came to their school with.

WHY IS IT WHEN YOU’RE AT THE BEACH HOT WOMEN NEVER TAKE OFF THEIR BRA’S TO TAN BUT FAT WOMEN DO -METROIDRAGE

How else are they compete for attention with hot girls wearing bikinis? Plus, put a rubber band thats too small around your thigh. That stuff hurts.

Did you throw your cap in the air for HS graduation? -MinimusRex

Hell yes, I ripped the tassle off and frisbeed the fucking thing as hard as I could at my dean, sitting on stage. It came about three feet from slicing off his head. It hit an empty folding chair loudly and I laughed my ass off. I looked up, grabbed a cap nearest to my head size and returned it.

Are you people so simple-minded, uncultured, ignorant, and boring that your favorite foods are things like pizza, hamburgers, burritos, and macaroni and cheese? Like not even specific preparations, just those foods in GENERAL?
How can your favorite food be a burrito from Chipotle? Do you not realize how much awesome food there is out there?
YOU CAN DO BETTER CHILDREN -AsianChildKing

A lot of these foods are comfort foods, and are just labeled as favorites because of the nostalgia and warm and fuzzies they get when considering them.

Also, there’s nothing wrong with chain foods. Paid expert chefs are modifying ingredients to better showcase their food. A lot of science goes into making chain foods good tasting, which a Mom and Pop restaurant can’t compete with. Just because ingredients are fresher or more wholesome does not mean that the food is guaranteed to come out better.

The bladder does not help with water retention, once liquid is in it, it does not return up the ureter to the kidneys. Is it a scent marking adaptation? Is it used as an end point for urinary tract infection? What evolutionary pressure forced us to stop peeing anytime we needed to? -jdawg256

I’m going to assume this is a veiled argument of creationism, so I’ll say; Why do Muslims have bladders? If God created everyone in his image, why would Muslims have bladders? Unless you are saying that God is a Muslim, and that’s not gonna go over well at all at your next Bible study meeting.

How can you sneak prescription drugs on a plane if they’re not in your name? -PlayorDie

Buy a pill organizer, the kind with the days on it. Fill it up. Claim you need them to live. Go on your trip.

Did you get to see Will Ferrells “Survivorman” episode? -Nationalsfan18

I still cannot believe what they did with those two buried sticks.  That was mayhem right there. Ron Burgandy has brass balls.

Have you heard of this anti-rape implant for women?  “Rape-axe”? -HomelessDepot

Which is why I always test my rape victims with a finger first.  Gotta beware of that vagina sarlaac.  But seriously, it seems like a sad state of affairs when this needs to even be considered.

wtf mate!?? i’ve never been in an office where they make you buy your own coffee. this is an outrage! they should have told me this during the interview! -MormanNailer

Buy a coffee machine. It certainly would ingratiate yourself to the new co-workers.  Ask the boss beforehand if it’s okay you do so, maybe he’ll give you the company card.

Keeping count of how many girls you have had sex with is like counting of many drinks you have had. Only pussies count. Real men just keep going. -Blutowannabe

The only difference is when you go to drink a beer, its not mad if you’ve had a dozen more previously in your life.

The What’s What, Volume 48

When a celebrity gets behind a cause it makes me not want to support the cause. It just makes the whole thing seem insincere. And let’s face it, celebrities aren’t exactly the most educated of society. -Shozone

I hate it when any person only champions a cause because someone they know died of whatever. Like parents who care about drunk driving only after their kid dies from it. Maybe if they cared before hand they could have prevented it. Always seems like attention whoring and exploiting the relationship they had with the dead.

How come all these movies coming out are in 3D? -BlackKenneth

I have no idea. It’s not like it’s new technology.  It’s not like it only works in theaters.   All I do know, is that stuff hurts my eyes after 10 minutes.

The Atheist’s Kryptonite;

If God exists and you believe in Him, you win everything.
If God does not exist and you believe in him, you lose nothing.
If God does not exist and you do not believe in him, you lose nothing.
If God exists and you do not believe in him, you lose everything.   -pbpaul

Lose nothing besides  the dignity, money, effort and time wasted on supporting a  fairy tale, you mean. Plus, believing in God to hedge your bets isn’t really belief at all.

Do you ever go shopping by yourself? -blueyoshi

I have to go alone or my wife will make the trip 5 times longer. I get in and out as quick as I can, I hate stores and lines and malls and stuff, so I’m like a shopping ninja.

“Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it.” – George Bernard Shaw.  Your reaction, please?  -OfficeMaxwell

I’m a globalist, so you are preaching to the choir here. Alot of people will never put themselves in the uncomfortable position of dealing with their choices of religion or patriotism if they were born in another land. No one likes to feel wrong.

Do you believe the rapture will happen? -Webw1retoobs

Not in the biblical sense.  The world will end somehow, but there will be no “judgement” of who gets into some mystical theme park.

I saw “The Prestige” on HBO last week. I enjoyed it, but  I don’t quite understand how Hugh Jackman’s cloning machine worked. Did the real person get transported to the field above the audience or did the clone? Or was it random? Because Jackman’s character said on his death bed that “You don’t know what it’s like. It took courage walking towards your death every night. Not knowing if you were to plunge to your watery grave or be the Prestige.” -LPOA88

When I saw the pile of top hats, I just assumed it was all a scam by Bowie Tesla. I was a little disappointed that they were using electronic cloning as an actual plot device.  Seemed like a cop-out.  Not just because of the ridiculous notion, but everything had been about illusions up until that point. They were using bad science to bastardize their own movie.  And through all this, I still enjoyed the movie.

I’ve been in a relationship with this girl for 3 months now, and we never argue, and get along 100% perfectly. is this normal for todays day in age? is this like a sign we’ll last? -Milk_Dudley

A relationship really can’t know what its made of until you start living together, from my experience. Good things either go bad or get better. You pretty much know whats up at that point.

“Tradition is the enemy of progress”.I heard this statement in my Intercultural Communications class and it made a lot of sense to me. Look at Prop which recently passed in California for example. A lot of people argued that marriage should be kept “traditional”, which is a steaming load of bullshit, considering Miscegenation(mixing of races) was illegal for some time in the past. -JustaFreek

Well, they are antonyms.  Tradition = Keeping things the same, Progress = Change (presumably for the better) No such thing as “traditional progress”.

Whoever came up with Taxed Enough Already (TEA) is a freaking genius! Double meaning! -rezless

Do you mean besides the fact that “Taxed Enough Already” implies they were fed up with the taxing that the last guy they voted into office inflicted upon them, or completely misunderstanding that the Boston Tea Party was a protest that actually wanted their citizens to be taxed by their elected officials?  Add in that it’s a tee-ball set up for opponents to call them “teabaggers”.  But, other than this, yeah it’s really smart.

I received information that led me to the realization that I don’t mean nearly as much to her as she does to me. I need to feel better, please help -Gargantuwon

The bullshit that you are feeling has a benefit.  It’s called “experience”. And you might get enough to gain a level and improve your wisdom attribute. That’s how it works, seriously. So, congrats on learning some important information today. Next step is phasing it into your decision making. Good luck.