The What’s What, Volume 46

I just lost my virginity!  -EyemurGod

Congrats! Good thing you learned to hold the tail, or it would have been uncomfortable.

Sometimes I seriously feel like the only person I know who will gladly listen to something someone else recommends me. And by listen to it, I mean from beginning to end. Oftentimes I’ll recommend a song or artist to a friend and he’ll start the song, but skip to random segments until he reaches the end. Then he’s surprised by how much he doesn’t like what he heard. No shit, you douche.  If you had discovered the song on your own you’d like it much more (assuming you liked it in the first place). -DaMastah5

Because it’s obvious from the beginning that they aren’t into it? They should have to stomach an extra 3 minutes of something uninteresting because your opinion demands it?  Music is like taste, subjective acquirement. Stop forcing your vegemite onto people.

How long will it be until we stop blaming everything bad that happens on Bush? -caucasian_child

Depends on who you voted for.

My girlfriend is pissed at me because I chose to play pokemon over sex with her…wtf? HaterBlaze

That’s why you purchase a DS or PSP, to play videogames WHILE having sex.

My roomate didn’t bring a computer with to college, so I’ve let him use mine to check his email two or three times. Last night I did it again, but I left the room to get a drink of water. When I came back, he clicked off a porn site. I should’ve said something then, but I was tired and didn’t feel like a confrontation, so I pretended I didn’t see. How can I politely tell him to fuck off next time he asks? -Cool-Aid

Yeah, you should be the only one looking at porn on your computer.

Curt Schilling: Baseball Hall of Famer? -Acuevsa66

For being epic in clutch situations, yes.

What’s more aggravating; Ignorance or Arrogance? -JoePlantation

Ignorance can be excused with apathy.  There’s really no excuse for arrogance.

You like Panera sandwiches? -MtRushless

Nah. I find them way too expensive to have someone put a frozen sandwich in a George Foreman grill for two minutes. I really like thier muffins, scones and coffee. Thats what I get when my wife forces us to eat there. It was way better when it was Au Bon Pain back in the day.

“No Diggity” is still the greatest R&B or Hip hop song of the past 15 years. -Rocketperson4

I’m gonna go with either “Bump n Grind” or “That girl is poison” for me personally.

Even if Michael Jackson did bad things to little kids he’s still one of the best artists ever. -Aldn45

Yeah! Talented people should be able to put their fingers wherever they want! They’re talent is more important than some nobody’s asshole and dignity.

The What’s What, Volume 22

My sister gets high every day and she keeps eating all the food in the house.  -FinalConsideration

Start making a stash in your room. Thats what I did when I heard my sisters were bringing over their mooch friends.

What’s the worst food to burp back up? For me, it’s hot dogs. -GhostofEllisBurks

I would say Orange Juice.  That shit hurts.

Does it make me a BITCH for playing Madden on ROOKIE level? -Papayawarrior

No, you are only a bitch if you go 19-0 beating the computer by 50 every game.  If you are competing on Rookie, you are just bad at the game.  Which is better than being a bitch, in my opinion.

Let’s face it, our world will never be progressive until our parents die.  Their generation is still filled with stupid backwards ideas. -Klassyk

90% true, they’ll be alive long enough to feel powerless as they watch their antiquated ideals crumble into society right before their death.  Unfortunately, they won’t last to realize they are wrong and wasted years of resources and effort on petty bullshit.

Decided on who you are voting for? -jbauer4545

I always vote third party, because I’ve never lived in a swing state.  I’m a registered Republican, just so I can vote in the primaries.  Theres never small government for people candidates anymore, though.  It’s all small government for business.

I can’t believe people are reading The Watchmen now, 20 years too late. -Megsboyee

How else will they be able to complain about the movie?  Being sheeple takes work.

We agree that House is the best TV character correct? -Stankz

Oh, hes right up there.  I’d throw him into the mix with both Tracy Morgan and Alec Baldwin from 30 Rock.  My female lead goes to the redhead leader of the steno pool from MadMen.  Shes got everyone on lock-down.

Have you ever bent someone over a kitchen counter? That’s what they’re for. -Target0007

No, kitchen counters are way to tall. You can’t bend any girl over them unless your humping Bigfoot.  Any seasoned gentleman knows the back of a dining chair or the kitchen table is the best place to really lay down some kitchen punishment.

How much is an ounce of pot in your area?  -rillumrt

Same as in your area, 1/16th of a pound.  Lettuce head.

It’s funny throughout this 8 years I’ve found that there have been many criticisms of President Bush, but the main criticisms of Bush have painted two vastly different pictures of our president…either he’s a complete idiot that’s 2 IQ points above an ice cream cone….or, an evil mastermind capable of turning a legitimate war on terror into a revenge mission against Saddam and Iraq.  So, WMC, which is it?

My opinion of him has changed many times since he took office. Now, I think hes just an average guy, who was excited to learn that he could become president, was elected, found himself in over his head and relied on bad advice from people he trusted, and helped get him into office.  I don’t think he’s as dumb as everyone else thinks. I just think hes trusting people who have their own agendas at heart, and is too deep to either recognize this or too embarrassed to do anything about it.

I’ve never been to red robin and my familys going there I know its like the starbucks one but seriously what should I get?

The first time I went to Red Robin, I got the Banzai burger.  I’ve been there dozens of times since, and never looked at the menu. The Banzai Burger is that good.

Favorite alcoholic beverage? -21cccp

Double shot of Jamesons, and a Ginger Ale.  Though, I barely drink anymore, I can put three of these down before I feel a hint of unlightenment.

At what age do you think a guy should get the **** out of their parents house? -kerby414

The fact that you don’t want to leave makes you a loser, the complacency.  If you are broke and just waiting for a check to move out, or whatever, you’re good.  Doesn’t matter what number is on your license.