The What’s What, Volume 122

Being unemployed is very stressful.  I currently have 7 job applications that are “live”, I’m reading a book relevant to my field, I have an interview Friday, and I’m looking for part time work every day. But I never feel productive “enough”, and any down time or break or late morning makes me feel like I’m worthless. -GrizleeTee

Needing money and searching for and holding a job are stressful.  Being unemployed is awesome.

What do donut shops/fast food places do with leftover food at the last shift of the day? Do employees get to eat it or take some home? Are you supposed to just throw it out regardless of whether you’re hungry and could use some food? Would you get fired if you sneak a quick burger instead of throwing it out? I heard it was a health code violation to donate. I don’t know why but I am very curious as to what they do with it. -GamingGerbil

Actually, it’s a very common practice for food pantries to get the days leftovers. Employees are usually fed earlier with a staff meal, especially for them. But if you are still hungry, a lot of places will cook you something to take home, so you can eat there or give to a family member. This is only plausible when the kitchen is closing down, not as likely at all if it’s just then end of your shift. Also, if you work at a chain, it all depends on the manager, and is less likely.  But day old donuts are given to employees or charities, if they ask  the right people, in my experience.

Would you make a good dictator of the world? -BeefMW

I believe so. I’m tolerant, globalist, and fair. I try hard to fight hypocrisy every day. Plus, I believe it would be beneficial to be an atheist in this situation.  I dont want the job, though. Sounds like a lot of work.   It’s not a great answer, I know.  I’d be more interested in the person who answers “No”, honestly.  That bastard has got stories to tell. 

Have you ever got a bitch that was way outta your league? -See1ngTh1ngs

I have been with girls that I did not think would be into the kind of person I am at all.  That really opened up a lot of doors.  Made me much more open to rejection.  I never put anyone in a “League”.  If they were interested in me, they were already in my league.  

Do you like V8 juice? I’m talking the real deal none of that new age fusion mess.   I ask because no one I know IRL besides my grandma drinks the stuff but I love it.  -ConcordCal

I like it occasionally. Like once a month, I’ll crave it. And I can’t eat anything with it.   I do like the Fusion, though. Those mofos taste like fruit juice. I chug 8 ounces every morning and every night.

SERIOUS VIRGIN QUESTION: How long can/should a guy hold it in when having a blow job?-LuvvableGohan

Unless you got a diamond in the rough 1%er, the blow job is only there to please you. I promise she wants it over quick, or else shed be sitting on your dick.  Enjoy her efforts, but dont waste them. If she shows even the slightest hint of discomfort, youd better finish up, or you’re chancing future offerings.

What are some cool unethical things to do? -ChrisKamanMyMouth

Cool: Trespassing on Federal or State property.  Cooler: Breaking out of prison.  Coolest: Breaking INTO prison.

Fact: People who don’t have social anxiety disorder have no clue what it’s like, even though they (falsely) think they can relate. fullquietcasket

You could say this about anything and be accurate. Circumcision, race, gender, marriage, anal warts, a Snickers bar.  Settle down with the overdramatics.

Choose: A one night stand with the celeb of your choice or find your soulmate but you can’t have sex.   Say she has some sort of vaginal condition that makes sex extremely painful to her. Which option do you choose?  One night stand is on your bed and she leaves immediately in the morning disgusting by what took place. No chance of her staying.-Aqualead12

Great question. Assuming I am single, I think Id still go with the soulmate. Its the only available lasting relationship, plus being my soulmate, she’s in the 1%er of enjoying offering mouth party.  But, I dont believe in soul mates. So, I’ll take Reese Witherspoon and her greatest regret honors.
When you last made dinner, what was it? -CanadiAnne
BBQ boneless pork ribs, Mac n cheese, Baked beans with bacon and maple syrup, Corn on the cob, Toast and pickles
hey today show, “heaven is for real for kids” isn’t a news story.  kid had a near death experience and went to heaven! better put them on national television.  family: “we’re not trying to profit from this, we just made a kid’s book, a young adult novel, an adult novel, and a full length movie.”  plus, hey, did you guys know jesus is a big white guy who wears a giant golden crown? -ILoveLED1080
Jokes on you for thinking that Network morning shows are coming with any kind of journalism, what so ever.   Theres a reason 90% of their programming is dangerous kids toys, cooking segments and the national weather.   Read a paper, online.  If you want Paula Deens latest meatloaf recipe, sensationalized “news” raped of all context, and Matt Lauer skiing down sand, you knock yourself out. But, you’re complaining that the Prohibition documentary you’re watching on TV doesn’t have enough trivia and cash prizes. You are watching the wrong show for what you want, is the point.