The What’s What, Volume 74

why does the fbi get involved when people make joke threats concerning the president? doesn’t that violate the first amendment? you can have things like the anarchist’s cookbook but as soon as you make a joke about terrorism the fbi/government gets involved. -skatewaker

Because they want to discourage people joking about it. It makes the real threats easier to spot if everyone is afraid of joking about it.  Which is why anything that makes the news gets investigated, they want everyone to make sure they are on top of it.

I was just playing the most addictive game ever,Tetris. Have you heard of it? -blameradio

My Dad was literally addicted to this game from ’86-’88. We’d have a line of ten year olds ready for a Tecmo Bowl or Double Dribble tournament, and my dad would be sitting there all cracked out “One more game, just one more game,” he’d say.  I mean it was fun and everything, but this dude was playing some puzzles.

Why the hell does it take so long for shippers to process orders nowadays?  Used to,I could get my Amazon order of books in 2-3 days and Walmart orders in the same frame of days but now it takes almost a week to process and to get here to my house. Goddamit,I want my DX book so bad. And my A Bridge Too Far DVD from Walmart. IS IT BECAUSE OF THE ECONOMY?! -TexBox99

After the Back-to-School sales end, all companies get busier for the holiday season. It’s not just people ordering Christmas gifts, its people ordering supplies so that they can make their Christmas gifts to be available in time for the holidays.

So, just STFU already. Back in the day, when you ordered something, it ALWAYS took 4-6 weeks for delivery. So, settle down or get off your lazy ass and go down to the store and get it yourself. Internet purchases are not meant for people who need things immediately.

I’m so damn tired of the health care bill debate..we need to move on to another issue- VinceMcMahonisGod

Personally, I like my issues resolved before moving on to another one. Unless you are an insurance lobbyist, it’s in everyones best interest to complete this issue.  I’m sure we’re all very sorry that you are bored, though. Hopefully the next issue that comes up affects you more. Like gays in the military, or federal subsidies for the next Royal Rumble.

I’m afraid that one day they’ll televise the Special Olympics.  And someone will walk in on me laughing my ass off at the hurdles race. -Mootsghost

I feel like they tried this in the 80s in conjunction with the hooplah surrounding the LA Games.  It got very low ratings. Apparently, people don’t care to watch substandard competition.   And if they do, they can watch the same level of competition at any local rec center on any given Saturday afternoon.  Not saying they aren’t inspirational or anything.  But legitimate competition has historically gotten better ratings than inspiration.

Congress Approves Law Extending Hate Crime Protections to Gays, thoughts?  -Nickelwise

Hate crime legislation fogs issues and makes martyrs of the attackers.  Plus, I personally would feel like a hypocrite asking for special protection when I was fighting for equal rights.   Everyone should be treated equally, end of story.

Bong Water Can Be Illegal Drug, Minnesota Court Rules.  Uh-Oh Twins fans. -Lohanbrau

My basement carpet is a class A felony in Minnesota, I wager.

Wow Kevin and Jennifer really fell apart this week, they ruined restaurant wars.KennyPowersJetSki

Yeah is was the biggest beatdown in Restaurant Wars history.  The Volt Brothers are gonna run away with this thing.  The QuickFire Challenge with the blind folds and everyone had ten minutes to pick up where the first person left off, was really cool though.   I thought that was creative and ultimately kick-ass, and would love to see it again.

Bill Simmons is the best sports writer out there.  His use of comedy in his artciles are a nice change to the formatic way everyone else writes.   Its in my blood to not like him because he’s a huge celtcs homer and hates the lakers.   Check him out. -JuggledNuts

I’m familiar and very much enjoy his work.  But he’s on the verge of being over-exposed, and a tad self serving for me.  I mean, columns about his retiring Dad and dead dog? Is ESPN his fucking dream journal now?  His podcast is fun, the only thing holding him back is having the voice of a ten year old with strep throat.  I very much enjoyed him on PTI, though.  He dos a great job of portraying genuine passion in what he’s saying, without the phony energy and excitement like some other sports commentators do.

How is Borderlands? You didn’t seem to play it that much. -Glocktypus

It’s a complete failure that we can’t play BorderLands 4-player local.  Some of us have friends within fucking driving distance.   TV’s are big enough to support quad screens way more than the 27″ GoldenEye days anyways.  And how is it that I can play four players online, but not at home?  Complete bullshit.  But yeah, it was fun for a bit.  My PS3 had it’s second YLOD in 3 months with a rented game stuck in the bastard, so Sony is on my shit list.  Customer service replied to my insightful letter with a form email that didn’t help at all.    Service and equipment reliability were two main reasons I felt comfortable investing with Sony to begin with.  I can’t believe I have to actually reconsider Microsoft as being better in those categories.

Your writing sucks.  Your opinions suck.  Why do people care what you have to say? -SabbyGee

I don’t know.  Maybe they don’t.  Maybe they just like seeing their question printed in a blog.  I’m not your thing, that’s cool.  I suggest not reading the column, anymore, though.  If you don’t like Vegemite, don’t eat it.  Problem solved.